Office Gossip

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I've been away from the blogspace for a bit because I'm consciously trying to reduce the number of hours I spend before the computer. Usually, I switch my laptop on the second I finish brushing my teeth to check my email. Though nobody is emailing me, of course. I closed all my accounts on social networking sites a year ago and I'm glad I did so. Earlier, people used to put up stuff from real life on their profiles, now they do stuff in real life just to load it on Facebook. See, I'm becoming a real aged character, whining about technology and what people used to do earlier and what they do now and how the golden past will never grace the earth again. My lone addiction remains my GChat status message. My 2009 resolution is to never switch on my laptop at home on workdays since I sit before a computer for 8 hours at work anyway. I shall age gracefully into a fuddy duddy who misses pagers and Yahoo greeting cards (which, by the way, Visitor sent me because I whined about it on my status message- yippie!!).

It has been the golden period for office gossip though. What with people getting fired, hired, and given forced farewell parties, it's been a cartload of fun. The best of all gossip has to do with Ms.TBKH.

Now TBKH joined us and we were all welcoming and sweet and helllloooooo, esprit de corps, one team-one goal etc. And then, someone whispered that TBKH is actually the progeny of a big dude in our parent company. Conspiracy! A debate raged on in our internal chat applet- was she really HIS daughter???!!!! How come nobody told us??!!! If this information has been kept secret, there must be an ulterior motive to it, musn't there??? God...we should be careful with her and etc. TBKH's name isn't TBKH, of course. It stands for Tera Baap Kaun Hai- a title I came up with because that's the only thing everyone seemed to be wondering about her.

Anyway, I was one of the first persons to know this news, so I did extensive research on Google and found cyber tracks connecting her inextricably to the company and the big dude. Besides, she'd mentioned that her dad is bald and big dude is bald, too! PROOF! Here it was! The information was disseminated conscientiously. People added their bits and pieces to it and now, I think even the teaboys know it (the van driver certainly does, he was advised to leave her and go if she isn't at her spot at the right time...after all, why should 'ordinary' employees be made to suffer for the arrogance of the rich and the famous- my colleagues have suddenly turned communist). TBKH has no idea, of course. Poor thing. I'm reminded of YGP's (the dean and director of PSBB) unfortunate grandson who studied in our school. He won the least number of votes when he stood for elections.

There's tonnes of other office gossip of course, but I have work to do now and I can't blog from home. So bye bye, so long, tra-la.

Blah

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I switched on my laptop with great enthusiasm to write a truly remarkable post. But every time I clicked on the 'Connect' icon, the screen would freeze and I'd have to restart. I had to press down that small round button till the screen went black and then start all over again. The amount of frustration created by computers is unimaginable. Slow websites make me want to tear my hair out. Files that download like snails make me want to leave the room and bang the door. When Gmail opens in HTML mode, I want to subject my computer to a few tight slaps. When paper gets stuck in the printer, I want to pull it out and tear it to tiny shreds and then stamp on it. You'd know my life if you looked up my GChat list and found out who is blocked, who is on 'show always'. I love my computer. I truly do. We have a stormy relationship and I'm the wife-beater.

What an entirely boring month this has been. Silambarasan and Trisha shot a scene at Ode Cafe for Gautam Menon's new film. I shouted 'Ello!' to Gautam Menon when our van went past him. He's a grouch, all right. I think Ode Cafe made some decent money from the rent because they've started a new counter with menu card and all. And they actually have more than half the things they claim to have.

Mr.Eighty Plus who detests me has finally bid goodbye. Can't say I was sad. Was gleeful, if you want to know the truth. Dressed up for the occasion and all. A farewell party IS a party, after all. My GChat status message read- So long ole man, don't bother keeping in touch! Google is the cartographer of my life. Sob.

I'm so tired of people debating Slumdog Millionaire. Please shut up.

I'm feeling godawfully sluggish. My phone has 5 rupees balance and I tried recharging it through my bank. But it just didn't work. Then I called Vodafone customer service and a poor girl called Gladies who sounded anything but glad spoke to me for 15 minutes trying very hard to understand what I was trying to say. She finally said she couldn't do anything about my problem but would be glad to help if I had other problems. Unfortunately, I did not have any other problem and I was sorry to have let her down.

My parents manage to steer every topic of conversation to that of marriage and my biological clock. My biological clock is apparently approaching an apocalypse and I need to do a carpe diem before it is too late. The biological clock is like the equator. It's an imaginary measure but what wonderful theories rotate around it! It has not helped that I've had to attend two weddings this month. I went for one last evening and my mother pointed out a lady who had been to the US in the recent past. She accurately predicted that she would come towards us and tell us about her visit. And the lady did. I had one of my hysteria seizures and had to try very hard indeed to behave like the well-brought-up child that I am.

Almost every bride on the planet straightens her hair. Why like this?

I've watched Red Dragon four times in the last four days on my laptop. I like pretending I'm a person with dark depths.

I'm now re-reading Sophie's World. I needed to go and buy several things this weekend urgently- credit on my phone, importantly- but I did not budge out of the house. My chair is my world. I'll become chair-shaped in a few more years. Wouldn't that be something.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is so boring.