Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Zombie Yoga

***

GBM finished two weeks of life on this planet yesterday. Thanks to her, I've managed to shed all my pregnancy weight gain plus some more. I'm considering launching an exercise video series Shilpa Shetty style pretty soon. The video will be called Zombie Yoga.

After a week of GBM's arrival, M declared that people who have two kids are either psycho or have extremely poor memory. Oh don't get us wrong, we're both amply proud of GBM's many milestones (including the 'mango-yellow' poop she produces without fail after every feed much to the delight of the pediatrician), but really...how did people ever manage to have a dozen kids and all back then? Did they stay awake for 12 years?

To be fair to GBM, she's actually quite a reasonable baby. She doesn't mind lying in the crib by herself in rapt contemplation of the ceiling and surrounding walls. She doesn't care if all of us leave the room and she's left alone. She also seems to remember all the songs I used to sing to her when she was inside me. My mum puts her to sleep now by crooning 'Found a Peanut'. We used to play the 'Senorita' song from Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara and Gita Govindam by MS Subbulakshmi to her earlier and she gets this hilarious recognition in her eyes when these two songs are played now. Yeah, yeah, we're now annoyingly gushy parents who think she's a reincarnation of Mozart.

Her other achievement that I'm glowy about is the variety of faces she makes. After she has fed enough, she pulls this face that looks like a drunk rowdy who has downed a huge amount of biryani and is now going to sleep. If I try to feed her more, she gets an expression of absolute disgust. Sometimes, she falls asleep while feeding and then wakes up in a terrific frenzy to make up for lost time. In these instances, she shakes her head vigorously and acts like she's some mental boxer in a do-or-die round. She also smiles a lot...which I'm grateful for.

As long as GBM is fed (and she sometimes feeds for 1.5 hours straight making me feel like Putana) and changed on demand, she doesn't throw a fuss. The only problem is that she is a night owl and chooses to make her demands only when I'm beginning to feel like a run-over mangy cat. Surprisingly, despite the loss of sleep, I haven't had any headaches...in the pre-baby years, even a loud noise that disturbed my 8-hour beauty sleep would give me a raging headache the next day. I suspect I've become a mother.

M was saying that 17 years from now, the two of us would go on a road trip to celebrate the fact that we were done being parents and GBM was off to University. I was beginning to enjoy the fantasy when I realized that I'm now nearly 26 and my mum is still losing her sleep over me by trying to put GBM to sleep. Jeez.

13 comments:

Sam said...

Moms will never rum out of work and definitely not when it come to caring for children. More experiences and joys to follow.

The Bride said...

"people who have two kids are either psycho or have extremely poor memory" You forgot horny and careless.

"She doesn't mind lying in the crib by herself in rapt contemplation of the ceiling and surrounding walls." Hmph. So irritating. May you have two sets of twins next. (Please note I am jealous).

"face that looks like a drunk rowdy who has downed a huge amount of biryani and is now going to sleep" This is where I got the Benji nick from. He looked like a drunken old man after his feed. You have to take a pic of this to traumatise her with in her teenage years.

Also, I have a feeling we are not going to be as unselfish as our moms in the grandparent duties category.

Dee said...

lol...don't blame your husband...it can drive you potty ! I stayed up for nearly 6 or eight years...as I had my three kids at close gaps...wht was I thinking? It just happened...ahem!I still suffer sleep deprivation symptoms...even tho they are now teens, lol! I now usually urge people to please have a sensible gap b/w babies if possible!

vishesh said...

hahahaha...When is the CD releasing?

Also the word verification below is telling me to inform you about 'savings'...does that mean anything to you?

R's Mom said...

hahahahha! When GBM reads this after she is 17 and you and M are on the road trip, she will come right after you!!!

Jealous to hear that she doesnt mind lying on the crib by herself - R wanted someone around ALL THE TIME! and she knew when we were not there!

Senorita is an excellent lullaby song..works like clockwork for R :)

M declared that people who have two kids are either psycho or have extremely poor memory. - So so true...totally agree

and LOL at the last line :)

RS said...

Oh yeah! I totally agree with you on the having 2 kids part - but dear girl - loss of memory is all due to the lack of sleep and you will forget-thats what Im being told now!! Enjoyyy....

starry eyed said...

"I suspect I've become a mother" made me laugh till I cried. Give that drunken lil' cutie a big smooch from me...good to hear she's smiling.

Sachita said...

Congrats GB.

To think of GBM's university eppove and all is too much - 17 * 365 days. no?

Sathya said...

pls post some pics of d baby know..?? hope u wont charge us 4 doing so...

Cocktail Party said...

Nice post... Happy motherhood :)

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