Kichidi Kid

***

One of my greatest childhood regrets was that I was not Egyptian. I corrected this by calling myself Isis in secret. Osiris was my imaginary boyfriend. Yes, really. When we had to name GBM, we made a long list for girls and a very short one for boys (I just knew it in my bones that it wasn't a fella in there!). After she was born, we finally picked a name that wasn't there in either of the two lists. Both M and I agreed that the name suited her, had a good meaning, sounded nice phonetically blah blah. My secret reason for agreeing on the name, however, was that it ends with a 'ra'. I'm hoping GBM will have an Egyptian phase like I did and insist on everyone calling her Ra. Heh.

Which of course, makes me one of those dunderhead parents who actually believes their children will care about fulfilling their hopes. If my own track record is anything to go by, this is a highly foolish dream. My mum desperately wanted me to be all classical. Like learn Bharatanatyam and Carnatic music. I did learn Bharatanatyam. For two torturous weeks. After which, I gave up because the class timings clashed with Oliyum Olliyum on Doordarshan.Now, I'm playing all sorts of classical songs for GBM (phoney, phoney me). Last week, I also introduced her to the Beatles. So that, you know, when she becomes a depressed teenager, she can be depressed with class.

My mum also tried to get me to learn to read and write Malayalam. I was least interested in this project as well. Currently, however, I'm feverishly reciting Malayalam nursery rhymes to GBM. Similarly, M, who never admits to his Telugu identity and insists on calling himself a Tamilian, only speaks to GBM in Telugu. So much so that I find myself speaking to her in Telugu-mixed-Malayalam at times.

I wonder what GBM will eventually speak. M and I mostly speak to each other in English. I can understand Telugu (or at least, the Chennai-Telugu that M speaks) but cannot speak it. M can understand Malayalam and speak it like Vivek in Tamil movies. The only regional language we both can read, write, and speak is Tamil. We live in Maharashtra where most people speak Marathi as their first choice and Hindi only if we request them to (it's only recently that I discovered that Marathi and Hindi are actually very different languages- I always assumed they were more or less the same since I couldn't understand either). I really don't know how this child is going to speak though we will, of course, harass her in the first few years of her life by acting patriotic and insisting on her learning three Dravidian languages all at once. She'll probably end up speaking a bit of each and learn none of the languages properly.

Deep down, I think I don't care. I don't think I'd mind very much if she only learned English properly. There, I said it. Not because I think English is superior to the other languages but because it makes sense practically speaking. That's one language she's got to learn properly if she's to survive her education (and her grammar Nazi mother). Neither M nor I bothered to learn our respective mother tongues (just like several other parents), so why should we push it down GBM's throat? She'll obviously have to learn the local language if she's to get by (which I still haven't but manage to get by because I work out of my bed). But really, if she doesn't want to learn everything else, I don't think I'm going to push her and get all holy-cow. I know this is how languages die and we-must-take-pride-in-our-culture yada yada, but really, decimal numbers are bad enough to contend with as a kid. Why make life more difficult?

I'm going to try and find out if she's interested in learning dance/music/skating/tennis/swimming/salsa/maggi noodles and so on like a dutiful mother, but if she doesn't give a damn, I'm going to be happy. I mean, I was happy being a useless lump as a kid, so why not? I don't think I'll be heartbroken if she doesn't become Airtel Super Singer or receive commendation from Kala Master.

I hope GBM will read though :| I've already put together a picture book collection for her and all. I think I'll find it hard to accept if she's not much of a reader. Or turns into one of those bimbettey girls who is forever trying on lipstick (there's no lipstick at home though...she could try and look Goth with my kajal if she wants). I'd feel a little let down by these two factors considering I'm a children's writer who did General Studies and everything. But ah well, as a parent,the sooner I accept my inability to influence my child, the longer I'll keep my marbles.

I will, however, bring her up to believe that Egyptians are cool.